My Manchester United XI

So we've got a new boss. We're 8th in the league, our worst start to a league in 24 years. Things have been pretty poor at Old Trafford. No, I'm not here saying Man Utd are now done, Moyes is not capable, we are doomed. Nah, because David Moyes is a very good football manager and he will get better as the season goes on. I am sure of it. We don't sack our managers like that, we are not Chelsea. Down and out? Down, sure. Never out.

I think back to the best of this club, all the wonderful players who have played for this club, some of the biggest reasons why I started supporting this great football club. 

Here, I list my favorite Man Utd squad.

1. Goalkeeper : Edwin Van Der Sar.

Edwin Van Der Sar

Initially, I was quite torn. There were only two options, I'm afraid. Edwin Van Der Sar and Peter Schmeichel. 

            Schmeichel, the big bad Dane, voted the Best GK in the World (1992) was one of the most dominant keepers I've ever seen. Van Der Sar was also massive and was a tireless servant  of the club and was largely successful. Also, Schmeichel played for Man City some time after he left us. Therefore, he is dead to me and Edwin Van Der Sar is my goalkeeper.

2. Right Back : Gary Neville!

Gary Neville

No question here. Gary Neville! One of the club's loyals. Great attitude, solid in defense, great captain. Moving on..

3. Central Defenders :  Rio Ferdinand and Jaap Stam.

Rio Ferdinand

Jaap Stam

Rio Ferdinand! The big badass centre back, when he joined us from Leeds was arguably the best in the world. Rock solid in defense,enthusiastic going forward and an all round great guy. In!

Jaap Stam! The strong Dutchman, in his three years at the club was a 

very very strong defender. One of Sir Alex's deepest regrets is to 

have let him go.

4. Left Back : Denis Irwin.

Denis Irwin

Very few were better than the Irishman. Could take the free kicks too. Bonus!

5. Central Midfield : Roy Keane and Paul Scholes.

Roy Keane

Paul Scholes

Roy Keane would be my captain. Great footballer, not one to hide his feelings and an amazing captain. Always drove the team forward.                                                                                                        

Paul Scholes! My favorite footballer! A magician with a football at feet. The crazy crosses, precision passing and a super powerful right foot. In!                                                                                                             

6. Left Wing : Ryan Giggs. 

WHO ELSE?

7. Right Wing : David Beckham/Cristiano Ronaldo. 

   

                                                                                 OR






Really hard to split these two. Absolute legends for Utd on the right wing, both of them. The magic remains.

8. Forwards: Eric Cantona and Ruud Van Nistelrooy/Wayne Rooney.

Eric Cantona

Wayne Rooney

Ruud van Nistelrooy

King Cantona! For sure.  Van Nistelrooy or Wayne Rooney? I can't decide.

Manager : Sir Alex.

 Pfft. Obviously.

My Bench :

Peter Schmeichel

Nemanja Vidic

Patrice Evra

Ole Gunnar Solksjaer

Micheal Carrick

Dwight Yorke

Teddy Sheringham

Players I wish played for Man Utd : Dennis Bergkamp, Zinedine Zidane and Thierry Henry.

Players I wish never played for Man Utd : Carlos Tevez and Diego Forlan.

Thank you.

Klein Hund, Klein Hund.

I was lounging around my room playing Halo on my XBOX when I thought, Hey! I should translate "Nayi Mari, Nayi Mari, Thindi Beke?" to German! Yes. I should. I can't believe nobody has ever done this before! It'll be a first! I will be the first person on Earth to translate Nayi Mari, Nayi Mari, Thindi Beke to German! And the whole world will kneel before me. I can't wait to get started. Firstly, I'm going to need the lyrics to it. Easy enough except nobody can go further than the first four lines. This is going to be tricky, I'll just Google it. Hang on.

Of course, Google has it. No need to phone my Grand dad. Let me just get started then. I'll try not to Google Translate anything. But then again, what's 'Theertha' in German? I'll start anyway.

PS: Nayi Mari, Nayi Mari, Thindi Beke? is a beloved Kannada rhyme about a little girl talking to her puppy. Yes, duly noted. I will get a life. In the meantime, HERE WE GO!

                                                Klein Hund, Klein Hund 

                                                                                   -  Aditya R Bhat.

                                       Klein Hund, Klein Hund,

                                       Möchtest du frühstück?

                                       Frühstück wollen, trinken wollen, 

                                       Alles wollen!

                                       Klein Hund, Warum willst du frühstück?

                                       Essen und das Haus bewachen!

                                       Klein Hund, Was werdst du, wenn ein Dieb kommt?

                                       Ich werde schreien 'BOW BOW' und laufen!

                                       Oh! Mein kluger Hund,

                                       Warten, Ich bringe deine Frühstück!

                                       Bitte, bringen Sie mir frühstück und werde ich immer Ihr Haus bewachen!

Thank You. (Vielen Dank).

That is all. (Das ist alles).

                                       

I shall get stuff done today

Last night, just before I went to bed, I remembered that I had nothing planned for today and I could get some studying done. I decided on one subject and set myself a target of finishing two units by the end of the day.

So, this morning, I woke up early and ran to the shower because I had to get my studying done. But, the solar water heating system was broken which meant I could only get cold water for my shower. I could've just showered in freezing water but since I'm not mental, I poured water into the old water boiling machine in the corner of the bathroom and flicked on the switch. The boiler would approximately take about 45 minutes to heat the required water in which time I could've started with studies of the first unit. But, I figured I could run for while on the treadmill and get a bit of exercise done so that I didn't have to shower again later in the day if I wanted to work out.

After I was finished with my bath, I settled down on my desk to start studying but I slipped some Tropicana on my desk and on my shirt. So, I searched the house for a sponge to clean it off. Then, I saw that my desk was quite messy so I figured I'd clean the whole desk because a clean and organized desk would help me get my studying done more effectively.

By the time I finished cleaning the desk and organizing my books and making my bed and cleaning my football posters, I felt quite hungry and I realized I hadn't had any breakfast. Since I was home alone, there was nothing in the fridge except a half eaten burger, orange juice that smelled like tears and pain and some suspicious looking yogurt can. I felt I couldn't effectively study on an empty stomach so I ran down to the grocery store to get some food. Then, I figured I was already there and there was a bunch of other crap I better get so I wouldn't have to worry about supplies while I got my studying done.

When I got home, I ate the sandwich I bought at the grocery store while watching an episode of Homeland. I was 20 minutes into the show when I was done with my sandwich so I decided that I would start studying right after the episode ended so as to eliminate the curiosity of knowing what Abu Nazir would do to Carrie while I studied.

2 pm and I settled down into my desk chair and realized it was squeaky and so I ran down to the hardware store and got some oil for the chair so that I wouldn't be distracted by the squeaking of my chair while I got my studying done. While at the hardware store, I ran into a friend who wanted to have lunch together. It had been a while since I saw her and I wasn't full from the shite sandwich, so I went along.

After lunch, I drove her home and got back just as the clock struck 5 to start studying. I found a notebook to make notes and pointers in, but I found that I had used the same notebook in the last semester and there was only a quarter of the pages empty. So, I ran down to the book store to get a brand new notebook because I enjoy the smell of it and also, making notes in a fresh notebook would kick start the semester's studies in a wonderful manner. I remembered that I also needed a new pen and therefore, I shopped for some stationery as I was there anyway. On the way out of the store, I inadvertently saw a dog's vagina which shot my mind and made my legs go funny but that's not the point.

When I got back, I saw dirty dishes from my earlier sandwich eating so I figured I'd do the dishes quickly because that would be one less thing to worry about while I got my studying done. By this time, it was 8:30 pm which meant the Man Utd vs Everton FC game was about to start. So, I got out some Mountain dew I'd bought earlier at the grocery store and settled down on the couch.

I just have to make sure I get to bed early because I want to be well rested for tomorrow so I can study two units.